Lesson 12 -Reformation: Healing Broken Relationships-

Lesson 12 -Reformation: Healing Broken Relationships-September 14 to September 20, 3rd Quarter 2013 REVIVAL AND REFORMATION. The lesson in verses, with notes, comes after the outlines sometimes of important Bible passages in its context. 

Friends,

   Revival will happen this time, and this is the way: If we ask God to give us His Holy Spirit and pray for each other, even for people we're not comfortable with in the church, and pray for our enemies. This is one of the things that God won't refuse. We don't have to be worried about asking God if this is His will, as this is always His will. As simple as that...

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  Visit www.sse6.blogspot.com for easy Sabbath School Lessons Resources in English and www.ese9.blogspot.com in French


SPIRITUAL POWERS

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 (NIV)4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have DIVINE POWER to demolish strongholds. 5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Ephesians 6:12 (NIV) For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

THIS VIDEO CAN BE SHOWN AT YOUR CHURCHES AS IT IS MORE THAN RELEVANT TO THE LESSONS. BE PATIENT AND WAIT TO UNDERSTAND ALL THE DIFFERENT ASPECTS AND ALL THE CONNECTIONS IN ORDER TO APPRECIATE THE POWER AND THE ATTENTION OF GOD, APART FROM THE EXTRAORDINARY IMAGES.

Click on the video at the bottom right for a totally enlarged screen, and connect the sound to powerful headphones and/or quality speakers. Find a Good Time, Be Amazed and Enjoy the Inspiration...PLEASE SHOW THIS VIDEO AT YOUR CHURCHES ON SABBATH AFTERNOON, BELIEVE ME IT WILL BE A HIT. SURELY IT WILL HAVE A BLESSED EFFECT ON THE SPIRITUALITY OF THE CHURCH.  MAY GOD BLESS YOU EVEN MORE AND KEEP YOU IN A FRUITFUL FAITH IN HIM.

Click on the following links and open another tab for these playlists. Listen to sacred music while studying the lesson.

Heritage Singers sing to give glory to God in order to comfort you and strengthen your faith: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgnbF8BcALg&list=PLA6FC3F51B3D3592A
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13U7QmSfmcI&list=PL5362507232EC2F63
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQ8IRymyYVo&list=PL0B2EC328B1EBB04F

Wintley Phipps sings and gives glory to God in order to exhort you and encourage you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8HffdyLd0c&list=PL1F72C26656C325A9
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMF_24cQqT0&list=PLF6E0F80C111634BB
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVlAPL901Gk&list=PLA7473A1301242907




From www.ssnet.org
http://www.ssnet.org/lessons/13c/helps/lesshp12.html

Lesson& References Index

Lesson 12 – September 14 – September 20

Reformation: Healing Broken Relationships

(All Bible texts are in the NKJV Bible unless otherwise indicated)

Sabbath Afternoon

Memory text: Romans 5:10

10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

Great spiritual revivals in the past fostered healed relationships. Movements of the Holy Spirit involve bringing people closer to God and to one another. They include breaking down the barriers in our relationship with God and breaking down barriers in our relationships with one another. In short, the greatest demonstration of the power of the gospel is not necessarily what the church says but how the church lives .

“‘By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another’” (John 13:35, NKJV). Without this love, all our talk about revival and reformation will come to naught.

From www.cqbiblestudy.org

Introduction Rehydrated

John 4:1–30

Sabbath SEPTEMBER 14

She adjusted her hands on the heavy water pot as she made her way across town. She detested fetching water. It was a constant reminder that she was the lowest of the low, the continually despised. All the women were suspicious of her promiscuity. And every man was aware of her easy vulnerability. But she was dependent on this village with its unhealthy relationships, hopelessly dependent on men to provide for her, and hopelessly dependent on her continual need for water.

He showed her the respect she’d never experienced.

Rough voices tumbled through the air. Jewish men, coming down the road toward her, laughing and joking. She stared straight ahead, conscious of their stares. It was obvious why she walked alone to the well in the heat of the day.

They jostled past, and she continued in the relative comfort of her solitude. Her eyes focused on the well. She was nearly there. But her heart sank again at the sight of a figure. A man . . . on his own. She hoped he was a Jew like the others. Then he wouldn’t have anything to do with her.

He turned to her, smiling a warm, open smile. Not one of those “I know what kind of woman you are” sort of smiles. She smiled back. Then he spoke: “Please, may I have a drink of water?” A Jewish man speaking to a Samaritan woman, and even asking for her help! Maybe he was an outcast too. She happily quenched his thirst. But he was even more delighted to quench hers.

She came to the well in a tangle of broken relationships, enslaved by her sins and her status. She came despised and rejected by those who considered themselves to be more righteous than she. She came with painful memories, heavy regrets, and an overwhelming sense of loneliness. But a few moments with Jesus had transformed her life. A few drops of His living water had trickled down her love-parched throat, reviving every fiber of her being. He spoke gently of her sinful status. He showed her the respect she’d never experienced and the hope she’d never known. Even though she hadn’t asked for forgiveness, she knew she’d been forgiven, washed clean, and now had a brand-new life to live. She just had to share this experience with everyone, even those who despised her!
She ran back to the town, and the love she’d been looking for all her life overflowed like water from her generous heart.

Sunday – From Fracture to Friendship

Romans 5:10

10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.

Ellen G. White, The Acts of the Apostles, pp. 169-170.

Paul and his company continued their journey, going to Perga, in Pamphylia. Their way was toilsome; they encountered hardships and privations, and were beset with dangers on every side. In the towns and cities through which they passed, and along the lonely highways, they were surrounded by dangers seen and unseen. But Paul and Barnabas had learned to trust God's power to deliver. Their hearts were filled with fervent love for perishing souls. As faithful shepherds in search of the lost sheep, they gave no thought to their own ease and convenience. Forgetful of self, they faltered not when weary, hungry, and cold. They had in view but one object--the salvation of those who had wandered far from the fold.
It was here that Mark, overwhelmed with fear and discouragement, wavered for a time in his purpose to give himself wholeheartedly to the Lord's work. Unused to hardships, he was disheartened by the perils and privations of the way. He had labored with success under favourable circumstances; but now, amidst the opposition and perils that so often beset the pioneer worker, he failed to endure hardness as a good soldier of the cross. He had yet to learn to face danger and persecution and adversity with a brave heart. As the apostles advanced, and still greater difficulties were apprehended, Mark was intimidated and, losing all courage, refused to go farther and returned to Jerusalem.
This desertion caused Paul to judge Mark unfavorably, and even severely, for a time. Barnabas, on the other hand, was inclined to excuse him because of his inexperience. He felt anxious that Mark should not abandon the ministry, for he saw in him qualifications that would fit him to be a useful worker for Christ. In after years his solicitude in Mark's behalf was richly rewarded, for the young man gave himself unreservedly to the Lord and to the work of proclaiming the gospel message in difficult fields. Under the blessing of God, and the wise training of Barnabas, he developed into a valuable worker.
Paul was afterward reconciled to Mark and received him as a fellow laborer. He also recommended him to the Colossians as one who was a fellow worker "unto the kingdom of God," and "a comfort unto me." Colossians 4:11. Again, not long before his own death, he spoke of Mark as "profitable" to him "for the ministry." 2 Timothy 4:11.

Colossians 4:10-11

10 Aristarchus my fellow prisoner greets you, with Mark the cousin of Barnabas (about whom you received instructions: if he comes to you, welcome him), 11 and Jesus who is called Justus. These are my only fellow workers for the kingdom of God who are of the circumcision; they have proved to be a comfort to me.

2 Timothy 4:11

11 Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for ministry.

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

From Fracture to Friendship

Paul and Barnabas worked together in witnessing for Jesus. But they had some strife between them (Acts 15:36-39). Paul could not trust one as fearful as John Mark. The potential dangers of preaching the gospel had caused John Mark at one point to desert Paul and Barnabas and return home.

“This desertion caused Paul to judge Mark unfavorably, and even severely, for a time. Barnabas, on the other hand, was inclined to excuse him because of his inexperience. He felt anxious that Mark should not abandon the ministry, for he saw in him qualifications that would fit him to be a useful worker for Christ.”-Ellen G. White, The Acts of the Apostles, p. 170.

Although God used all these men, the issues between them needed resolution. The apostle, who preached grace, needed to extend grace to a young preacher who had disappointed him. The apostle of forgiveness needed to forgive. John Mark grew in the affirming mentorship of Barnabas and, eventually, Paul’s heart was apparently touched by the changes.

 

How do Paul’s letters from prison to Timothy and the church at Colossae reveal his renewed relationship with John Mark and a new confidence in this young preacher? Col. 4:10-11; 2 Tim. 4:11.

Although details of Paul’s reconciliation with John Mark may be sketchy, the biblical record is clear. John Mark became one of the apostle’s trusted companions. Paul highly recommended John Mark as a “fellow worker” to the church at Colossae. At the end of Paul’s life, he strongly encouraged Timothy to bring John Mark with him to Rome because he was “useful to me for ministry” (NKJV) . Paul’s ministry was enriched by the young preacher, whom he had obviously forgiven. The barrier between them was broken and they were able to work together in the cause of the Gospel.

 

How can we learn to forgive those who have hurt or disappointed us? At the same time, why does forgiveness not always include a complete restoration of a previous relationship? Why does it not always need to?

 

From www.cqbiblestudy.org

Evidence Vertical and Horizontal Healing

Matt. 18:15–17; 22:39; Acts 15:36–41; Eph. 4:32; Phil. 2:3–11

Sunday SEPTEMBER 15

It seems that in today’s world, we draw a line between our “religious life” and “everyday life.” Our “religious life” includes going to church, praying, reading the Bible, and so on, while our “everyday life” includes everything else. We ask people, “How is your religious life?” Or we start our sentences with “Spiritually speaking . . .” However, this is foreign to the biblical worldview. Of the Ten Commandments, four talk about relating to God, while six deal with how we relate to others.

Paul himself wasn’t immune to friction.

Consider Adam and Eve. As soon as their relationship with God was damaged, the relationship between the two of them suffered (Gen. 3:12). Although the Bible isn’t your typical “relationship handbook,” it does have many examples of broken relationships being healed. In fact, the entire Bible is precisely about that—the reconciliation of a broken relationship between God and humanity. The Bible also shares principles that are helpful in pointing us in the right direction.

The apostle Paul wrote several letters to churches that were dealing with relationship issues. He urged them to be loving, humble, and nonjudgmental toward one another. However, Paul himself wasn’t immune to friction. In Acts 15:36–41, we read about a disagreement between him and Barnabas. Regarding the original word for “disagreement” in verse 39, we read that the “word in Greek is paroxysmos, from which of course we get ‘paroxysm.’. . . It carries overtones of severely heightened emotions, red and distorted faces, loud voices, things said that were better left unsaid. A sorry sight.”* Although we don’t know exactly how it happened, it seems that the issue was dealt with, and, after a time, Paul ended up highly regarding John, called Mark (Col. 4:10, 11; 2 Tim. 4:11).
The following are a few biblical principles that might be helpful when conflict arises:

Love the person (Matt. 22:39; Mark 12:31; John 13:34; Phil. 2:2). Get over your pride (Eph. 2:8, 9; 4:2; Phil. 2:3–11). When issues arise, communicate (Matt. 18:15–17; Eph. 4:26; James 1:19). Forgive (Matt. 18:21–35; Eph. 4:32).

REACT
How does our “vertical” relationship with God influence our “horizontal” ones? Is it possible to have one without the other?
* N. T. Wright, Acts for Everyone, Part 2 (London: Westminster John Knox Press, 2008), p. 53. 

 

Monday –  From Slave to Son

Philemon 1-25

1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother,
To Philemon our beloved friend and fellow laborer, 2 to the beloved Apphia, Archippus our fellow soldier, and to the church in your house:
3 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
4 I thank my God, making mention of you always in my prayers, 5 hearing of your love and faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints, 6 that the sharing of your faith may become effective by the acknowledgment of every good thing which is in youin Christ Jesus. 7 For we have great joy and consolation in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed by you, brother.
8 Therefore, though I might be very bold in Christ to command you what is fitting, 9 yet for love’s sake I rather appeal to you—being such a one as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ— 10 I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begottenwhile in my chains, 11 who once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me.
12 I am sending him back. You therefore receive him, that is, my own heart, 13 whom I wished to keep with me, that on your behalf he might minister to me in my chains for the gospel. 14 But without your consent I wanted to do nothing, that your good deed might not be by compulsion, as it were, but voluntary.
15 For perhaps he departed for a while for this purpose, that you might receive him forever,16 no longer as a slave but more than a slave—a beloved brother, especially to me but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
17 If then you count me as a partner, receive him as you would me. 18 But if he has wronged you or owes anything, put that on my account. 19 I, Paul, am writing with my own hand. I will repay—not to mention to you that you owe me even your own self besides. 20 Yes, brother, let me have joy from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in the Lord.
21 Having confidence in your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say. 22 But, meanwhile, also prepare a guest room for me, for I trust that through your prayers I shall be granted to you.
23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, greets you, 24 as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, Luke, my fellow laborers.
25 The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen.

Galatians 3:28

28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

Colossians 4:9

9 with Onesimus, a faithful and beloved brother, who is one of you. They will make known to you all things which are happening here.

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

From Slave to Son

While he was imprisoned in Rome, Paul met a runaway slave named Onesimus who had fled from Colossae to Rome. Paul personally knew Onesimus’ master. The Epistle of Philemon is Paul’s personal appeal to his friend regarding a restored relationship with the runaway slave.

Relationships mattered to Paul. The apostle knew that fractured relationships are detrimental to spiritual growth. Philemon was a church leader in Colossae. If he harbored bitterness toward Onesimus, it would color his Christian witness.

 

Read Philemon 1-25. What important principles about restored relationships can we find here? Remember, the key word is principles .

 

At first glance it is somewhat surprising that Paul did not speak more forcefully against the evils of slavery. But Paul’s strategy was far more effective. The gospel, ideally, breaks down all class distinctions (Gal. 3:28). The apostle sent Onesimus back to Philemon, not as a slave but as his son in Jesus and Philemon’s “beloved brother” in the Lord (Philemon 1:16).

Paul knew that runaway slaves had little future. They could be apprehended at anytime. They were doomed to a life of destitution and poverty. But now, as Philemon’s brother in Christ and willing worker, Onesimus could have a wonderful future. His food, lodging, and job could be made secure under Philemon. The restoration of a broken relationship could make a dramatic difference in his life. He became a “faithful and beloved brother” and co-laborer in the gospel with Paul (Col. 4:9).

Drawing from the principles of the gospel as seen here, what can you take away that can help you deal with whatever stresses and strains, even fractures, you have in relationships with others?

 

From www.cqbiblestudy.org

Logos The Healing Power of Intravenous Love

Matt. 18:15–17; Luke 23:32–34; John 13:35; Acts 15:36–40; Rom. 2:1–4; 1 Cor. 3:5–11; 12; 13; 2 Cor. 10:12–15; Eph. 4:26–32; Col. 4:10, 11; 2 Tim. 4:11; Philemon 1–25

Monday SEPTEMBER 16

Healing Fractured Friendships (John 13:35; Acts 15:36–40; Col. 4:10, 11; 2 Tim. 4:11)
In the beginning God created the perfect man and placed him in a perfect world. God spent time with him. But even in the perfection of Eden, there was something “not good” (Gen. 2:18). When we begin to understand the “not-goodness of aloneness,” we can begin to understand the needs of the human heart. As children and adults, we experience pain when we are abandoned by people who are important to us. We can learn how to mend some of those wounds by being there for each other. Friendships are healed when we work hand in hand with God to take away each other’s aloneness. We do this when we share in each other’s sad and happy emotions (Rom. 12:15), when we forgive each other, when we comfort each other, and when we support each other in our struggles (Gal. 6:2).

Let His love soak into you like water soaks into a sponge.

Healing Imbalanced Relationships (Philemon 1–25)
People are hurt when we create imbalances and inequalities in relationships. In God’s eyes we are all equal—male and female, slave and master, young and old. When we’re in positions of power and higher status, we often don’t realize or understand the pain and distress we cause others. Christians strive for equality among all people, driven by their desire to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with each other and with God (Mic. 6:8).
God’s ideal solution to this problem is described in Romans 12:3, 10, and 16. When we treat everyone we meet as if they are more important than we are, regardless of their age, gender, or abilities, a healthy respect flourishes and potentially damaging imbalances in relationships cannot take hold.

Healing Pride and Jealousy (1 Cor. 3:5–11; 12; 2 Cor. 10:12–15)
Pride and jealousy cause pain and broken relationships. It was Satan’s pride and his jealousy of God that fractured the perfect relationships of heaven. Now, pride divides and isolates, and jealously continues to destroy relationships. It was Jesus’ willingness to be completely humble that saved us. His gentle, loving, and submissive attitude enabled Him to be born into poverty, live with us in the sweat, blood, tears, and dirt of humanity, and eventually die the worst kind of death. Such humility is redemptive.
Paul’s metaphor of the church being like a body is powerful and practical. Every part of a body is important, even the unseen and taken-for-granted parts. No part of the body can flourish without the rest. We are to use all of our gifts to serve, bless, and strengthen each other. Pride has no purpose in loving, sharing relationships. The only thing we can be truly proud of is the way in which Jesus brings us all into a closer friendship with God.

Healing Hurts Through Forgiveness (Luke 23:32–34; Rom. 2:1–4; 5:8–11; 2 Cor. 5:20, 21)
Forgiveness is the greatest gift God has given us to restore our relationship with Him and our relationships with others. Because He forgives us, we can experience the wonder of His total acceptance of us, and the cleansing power of His forgiveness. Once we understand how much we’ve been forgiven, we can begin to offer forgiveness to others, even when they’ve tried to destroy our lives. One of the most powerful witnesses for God that this world can experience is when a broken relationship is restored through reconciliation and forgiveness.

Relationships Restored (Matt. 18:15–17; Luke 19:1–10; John 4:1– 42; 8:1–11)
In Matthew 18:15–17, Jesus describes a respectful and caring way to bring sinners back to Him and the loving family of believers. But before we do that for each other, we need to inspect our own lives through God’s eyes, and ask ourselves some questions about our own sinfulness (Matt. 7:4, 5).
Jesus modeled several restorative conversations with sinners, such as the woman caught in adultery, the woman at the well, and Zacchaeus. These conversations teach us how to talk to those we love who are struggling with sin. Whatever we do or say in such situations must express God’s love, acceptance, respect, encouragement, challenge, and support for the person concerned. Our words and actions must flow from our godly love for that other person if he or she is going to desire a closer relationship with God and other people.

The Healing Power of Love (1 Corinthians 13)
Relationships are restored to God’s ideal when we direct the healing power of God’s love into wounded hearts. We can only do this when God’s perfect love is pouring into our own hearts. Read 1 Corinthians 13:4–8, replacing the word love with God, and let His love soak into you like water soaks into a sponge. Then capture that patient, kind, respectful, forgiving, positive, hopeful love and live it out in each of your relationships, making sure that the restoring power of His love is reaching the desperate, lonely, distressing, and hurting places where it’s needed most.

REACT
1. How can God’s relational principles transform any relational struggles you may have ecountered?
2. Which of your close relationships is most in need of healing?

Tuesday - From Comparison to Complement

1 Corinthians 3:5-11

5 Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos, but ministers through whom you believed, as the Lord gave to each one? 6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase. 7 So then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase.8 Now he who plants and he who waters are one, and each one will receive his own reward according to his own labor.
9 For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, you are God’s building. 10 According to the grace of God which was given to me, as a wise master builder I have laid the foundation, and another builds on it. But let each one take heed how he builds on it. 11 For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.

1 Corinthians 12:1-11

1 Now concerning spiritual gifts, brethren, I do not want you to be ignorant: 2 You know that you were Gentiles, carried away to these dumb idols, however you were led. 3 Therefore I make known to you that no one speaking by the Spirit of God calls Jesus accursed, and no one can say that Jesus is Lord except by the Holy Spirit.
4 There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. 5 There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. 6 And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all. 7 But the manifestation of the Spirit is given to each one for the profit of all: 8 for to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, to another the word of knowledge through the same Spirit, 9 to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healings by the same Spirit, 10 to another the working of miracles, to another prophecy, to another discerning of spirits, to another different kinds of tongues, to another the interpretation of tongues. 11 But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.

2 Corinthians 10:12-15

12 For we dare not class ourselves or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they, measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise. 13 We, however, will not boast beyond measure, but within the limits of the sphere which God appointed us—a sphere which especially includes you. 14 For we are not overextending ourselves (as though our authority did not extend to you), for it was to you that we came with the gospel of Christ; 15 not boasting of things beyond measure, that is, in other men’s labors, but having hope, that as your faith is increased, we shall be greatly enlarged by you in our sphere,

1 Corinthians 3:9

9 For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, you are God’s building.

1 Corinthians 12:11

11 But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.

1 Corinthians 12:18-23

18 But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased.19 And if they were all one member, where would the body be?
20 But now indeed there are many members, yet one body. 21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.”22 No, much rather, those members of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary.23 And those members of the body which we think to be less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor; and our unpresentable parts have greater modesty,

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

From Comparison to Complement

As we saw in an earlier lesson, the church at Corinth had deep problems. What principles does Paul outline in 1 Corinthians 3:5-11, 12:1-11, and 2 Corinthians 10:12-15 for healing and restoration, all of which are so vital to revival and reformation?

In these passages, the apostle outlines critical principles of church unity. He points out that Jesus uses different workers to accomplish different ministries in His church, even though each one is laboring together for the building up of God’s kingdom (1 Cor. 3:9).

God calls us to cooperation, not competition. Each believer is gifted by God to cooperate in ministering to the body of Christ and serving the community (1 Cor. 12:11). There are no greater or lesser gifts. All are necessary in Christ’s church (1 Cor. 12:18-23). Our God-given gifts are not for selfish display. They are given by the Holy Spirit for service.

All comparisons with others are unwise, because they will make us feel either discouraged or arrogant. If we think that others are far “superior” to us, we will feel despondent when we compare ourselves to them. If we think our labors for Christ are more effective than the work of others, we will feel proud. Both of these attitudes cripple our effectiveness for Christ. As we labor within the sphere of influence that Christ has given us, we will find joy and contentment in our witness for Christ. Our labors will complement the efforts of other members, and the church of Christ will make giant strides for the kingdom.

 

Can you think of someone whose gifts in ministry have made you jealous? (Not too hard, is it?) At the same time, how often have you felt proud of your gifts in contrast to those of others? The point is, Paul’s concerns are an ever-present reality in fallen beings. Regardless of the side on which we fall, how can we learn the unselfish attitudes that are necessary in order to avoid the pitfalls here?

Testimony Restorative Forgiveness: The Way Forward

Matt. 18:21–35

Tuesday SEPTEMBER 17

“Give the erring one no occasion for discouragement. . . . Let him feel the strong clasp of a sympathizing hand, and hear the whisper, Let us pray. God will give a rich experience to you both. Prayer unites us with one another and with God.”1

“No one has ever been reclaimed from a wrong position by censure and reproach; but many have thus been driven from Christ and led to seal their hearts against conviction. A tender spirit, a gentle, winning deportment, may save the erring and hide a multitude of sins. The revelation of Christ in your own character will have a transforming power upon all with whom you come in contact. Let Christ be daily made manifest in you, and He will reveal through you the creative energy of His word—a gentle, persuasive, yet mighty influence to re-create other souls in the beauty of the Lord our God.”2

“They had long suffered anxiety and remorse, and now they rejoiced that he was still alive.”

“His brothers stood motionless, dumb with fear and amazement. The ruler of Egypt their brother Joseph, whom they had envied and would have murdered, and finally sold as a slave! All their ill treatment of him passed before them. They remembered how they had despised his dreams and had labored to prevent their fulfilment. Yet they had acted their part in fulfilling these dreams; and now that they were completely in his power he would, no doubt, avenge the wrong that he had suffered.
“Seeing their confusion, he said kindly, ‘Come near to me, I pray you;’ and as they came near, he continued, ‘I am Joseph your brother, whom ye sold into Egypt. Now therefore be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither: for God did send me before you to preserve life.’ Feeling that they had already suffered enough for their cruelty toward him, he nobly sought to banish their fears and lessen the bitterness of their self-reproach.

“ . . . ‘And he fell upon his brother Benjamin’s neck, and wept; and Benjamin wept upon his neck. Moreover he kissed all his brethren, and wept upon them: and after that his brethren talked with him.’ They humbly confessed their sin and entreated his forgiveness. They had long suffered anxiety and remorse, and now they rejoiced that he was still alive.”3

1. Ellen G. White, Christ’s Object Lessons, p. 250.
2. White, Thoughts From the Mount of Blessing, p. 129.
3. White, Patriarchs and Prophets, pp. 230, 231.
 

Wednesday - From Friction to Forgiveness

Romans 5:8-11

8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9 Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. 10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.11 And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.

Luke 23:31-34

31 For if they do these things in the green wood, what will be done in the dry?”
32 There were also two others, criminals, led with Him to be put to death. 33 And when they had come to the place called Calvary, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left. 34 Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”
And they divided His garments and cast lots.

2 Corinthians 5:20-21

20 Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. 21 For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

Ephesians 4:26-30

26 “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, 27 nor give place to the devil. 28 Let him who stole steal no longer, but rather let him labor, working with hishands what is good, that he may have something to give him who has need. 29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

Romans 2:4

4 Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?

1 John 1:9

9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

From Friction to Forgiveness

What is forgiveness? Does forgiveness justify the behavior of someone who has horribly wronged us? Is my forgiveness dependent on the offender’s repentance? What if the one with whom I am upset with does not deserve my forgiveness?

How do the following passages help us to understand the biblical nature of forgiveness? Rom. 5:8-11; Luke 23:31-34; 2 Cor. 5:20-21; Eph. 4:26-30.

 

Christ took the initiative in reconciling us to Himself. It is the “goodness of God [that] leads you to repentance” (Rom. 2:4, NKJV). In Christ, we were reconciled to God while we were yet sinners. Our repentance and confession do not create reconciliation. Christ’s death on the cross did; our part is to accept what was done for us.

It is true that we cannot receive the blessings of forgiveness until we confess our sins. This does not mean that our confession creates forgiveness in God’s heart. Forgiveness was in His heart all the time. Confession, instead, enables us to receive it (1 John 1:9). Confession is vitally important, not because it changes God’s attitude toward us, but because it changes our attitude toward Him. When we yield to the Holy Spirit’s convicting power to repent and confess our sin, we are changed.
Forgiveness is also so crucial for our own spiritual well being. A failure to forgive someone who has wronged us, even if they do not deserve forgiveness, can hurt us more than it hurts them. If an individual has wronged you and the pain festers inside because you fail to forgive, you are allowing them to hurt you even more.

Forgiveness is releasing another from our condemnation because Christ has released us from His condemnation. It does not justify another’s behavior toward us. We can be reconciled to someone who has wronged us because Christ reconciled us to Himself when we wronged Him. We can forgive because we are forgiven. We can love because we are loved. Forgiveness is a choice. We can choose to forgive in spite of the other person’s actions or attitudes. This is the true spirit of Jesus.

How can focusing on the forgiveness we have in Christ help us to learn to forgive others?

 

From www.cqbiblestudy.org

How-to Working Toward Win-Win-Win

Matt. 6:12, 14; 18:15–20; Rom. 12:20

Wednesday SEPTEMBER 18

Mending broken relationships is at the heart of Christ’s mission. God demonstrated excellent ways to heal and restore dysfunctional relationships. We can restore our relationships by using His guidelines.

Action. (1) Attending to a broken relationship defines you as a child of God (Matt. 5:9). (2) Clearly identify the fault you have experienced (Matt. 18:15). (3) Seek out the person who has offended you, gently explaining your concern. Jesus places the responsibility on you to seek them (Matt. 5:23, 24; 18:15).

Christ’s method promises a win-win-win situation.

Environment. (1) Privacy is important for creating a respectful context in which discussion and healing can take place. Initially, the fault is only to be discussed between the two parties involved. This is a primary environment. There are three possible relational environments in which conflicts can be resolved: one to one; one to two or three; and one to many. (2) If a resolution is achieved, you have gained a friend. Otherwise: (3) Employ a secondary environment by involving one or two other people. If this fails: (4) Employ a tertiary environment by involving the church. (5) The fourth step is to treat the person who refuses to be reconciled as someone who really needs to know Christ. How do we treat those who do not know Christ? Do we reject them? Of course not! Rather if they need something, we provide it for them. If they need a listening ear, we listen to them. If something’s troubling them, we pray for them. If they need food, we feed them. By ministering to them as people in search of God, we are more likely to win them back (Rom. 12:17–20).

Attitude. Christ’s method promises a win-win-win situation. It’s a win for you because you’ve gained a friend. It’s a win for humankind. And it’s a win for God’s kingdom. All that’s left to do is to apply it. Forgive so you may also receive forgiveness (Matt. 6:12, 14).

REACT
1. What else do the following texts teach us about restoring relationships? Matt. 18:15–35; Luke 17:3; James 5:20.
2. How crucial is it that we restore our relationship with God, as well as restoring broken relationships with one another?

 

Thursday – From Rancor to Restoration

Matthew 18:15-17

15 “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’ 17 And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.

Read Matthew 18

Ellen G. White, Gospel Workers, pp. 498-500

Church Discipline

In dealing with erring church-members, God’s people are carefully to follow the instruction given by the Saviour in the eighteenth chapter of Matthew. [See Matthew 18:15-18.]

Human beings are Christ’s property, purchased by Him at an infinite price, bound to Him by the love that He and His Father have manifested for them. How careful, then, we should be in our dealing with one another! Men have no right to surmise evil in regard to their fellow-men. Church-members have no right to follow their own impulses and inclinations in dealing with fellow-members who have erred. They should not even express their prejudices regarding the erring; for thus they place in other minds the leaven of evil. Reports unfavorable to a brother or sister in the church are communicated from one to another of the church-members. Mistakes are made and injustice is done because of an unwillingness on the part of some one to follow the directions given by the Lord Jesus.

“If thy brother shall trespass against thee,” Christ declared, “go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.” Do not tell others of the wrong. One person is told, then another, and still another; and continually the report grows, and the evil increases, till the whole church is made to suffer. Settle the matter “between thee and him alone.” This is God’s plan.

“Go not forth hastily to strive, lest thou know not what to do in the end thereof, when thy neighbor hath put thee to shame. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself; and discover not a secret to another.” [Proverbs 25:8, 9.] Do not suffer sin upon your brother; but do not expose him, and thus increase the difficulty, making the reproof seem like a revenge. Correct him in the way outlined in the word of God.

Do not suffer resentment to ripen into malice. Do not allow the wound to fester and break out in poisoned words, which taint the minds of those who hear. Do not allow bitter thoughts to continue to fill your mind and his. Go to your brother, and in humility and sincerity talk with him about the matter.

Whatever the character of the offense, this does not change the plan that God has made for the settlement of misunderstandings and personal injuries. Speaking alone and in the spirit of Christ to the one who is in fault, will often remove the difficulty. Go to the erring one, with a heart filled with Christ’s love and sympathy, and seek to adjust the matter. Reason with him calmly and quietly. Let no angry words escape your lips. Speak in a way that will appeal to his better judgment. Remember the words, “He which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.” [James 5:20.]

Take to your brother the remedy that will cure the disease of disaffection. Do your part to help him. For the sake of the peace and unity of the church, feel it a privilege as well as a duty to do this. If he will hear you, you have gained him as a friend.

All heaven is interested in the interview between the one who has been injured and the one who is in error. As the erring one accepts the reproof offered in the love of Christ, and acknowledges his wrong, asking forgiveness from God and from his brother, the sunshine of heaven fills his heart. The controversy is ended; friendship and confidence are restored. The oil of love removes the soreness caused by the wrong; the Spirit of God binds heart to heart; and there is music in heaven over the union brought about.

From the Sabbath School lesson by Mark Finley, www.ssnet.org

From Rancor to Restoration

Read Matthew 18:15-17. What three steps does Jesus give us to help us to resolve conflicts when we are wronged by another church member? How are we to apply these words in our contemporary situations?

Jesus’ desire in giving the counsel of Matthew 18 is to keep conflict in as small a group as possible. His intent is that the two people involved solve the problem themselves. This is why Jesus declares, “‘If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone’” (Matt. 18:15, NKJV). As the number of people involved in a conflict between two individuals increases, the more contention is created. People take sides, and the battle lines are drawn. But when Christians attempt to settle their differences privately, and in the spirit of Christian love and mutual understanding, a climate of reconciliation is created. The atmosphere is right for the Holy Spirit to work with them as they strive to resolve their differences.

There are times when personal appeals for conflict resolution are ineffective. In these instances Jesus invites us to take one or two others with us. This second step in the reconciliation process must always follow the first step. The purpose is to bring people together, not drive them further apart. The one or two who join the offended party are not coming to prove his/her point or to join in blaming the other individual. They come in Christian love and compassion as counselors and prayer partners in order to participate in the process of bringing two estranged people together.

There are occasions when all attempts to solve the problem do not work. In this case, Jesus instructs us to bring the issue before the church. He is certainly not talking about interrupting the Sabbath morning worship service with an issue of personal conflict. The appropriate place to bring the issue, if the first two steps have not helped to reconcile the two parties, is the church board. Again, Christ’s purpose is reconciliation. It is not to blame one party and exonerate the other.

 

“Do not suffer resentment to ripen into malice. Do not allow the wound to fester and break out in poisoned words, which taint the minds of those who hear. Do not allow bitter thoughts to continue to fill your mind and his. Go to your brother, and in humility and sincerity talk with him about the matter.”-Ellen G. White, Gospel Workers p. 499.

 

From www.cqbiblestudy.org

Opinion What’s the Point?

Rom. 5:8–11; Eph. 4:26–32

Thursday SEPTEMBER 19

Relational conflict is inevitable. Everyone’s different, and personalities can easily clash in some way or another. However, although no one enjoys it or seeks it, conflict is not necessarily harmful to a relationship. “Well-managed conflicts can actually bring people closer together. It encourages them to listen to each other’s needs, opinions, perspectives, hopes and feelings.”1

It’s not about you. It’s about God.

If we allow ourselves to be guided by the Holy Spirit, we can resolve conflicts in healthy ways that will enable us “to build up, to edify, to strengthen, and to genuinely praise the goodness of God in [others].”2

When conflicts arise, we should try to resolve them in ways that leave both parties feeling forgiven and accepted. But what’s the point? If I’ve been wronged, why should I bother to make it right? Christ says that we are all integral parts of His body (1 Corinthians 12). We are all meant to work together for the glory of God, accepting each other as unique and indispensable in Christ (1 Cor. 3:5–11). We have no authority to judge others, as we are just as much a sinner as the next person (Rom. 2:1–4). If we come into conflict with another child of God, we should work toward reconciliation.

But why? I’ve got lots of friends. If I lose one, so be it. It’s not about you. It’s about God. It’s about Christ’s perfect example in dealing with us, “while we were yet sinners” (Rom. 5:80). He forgave us completely and willingly at the height of our rebellion against Him. This is a beautiful example of how we can forgive each other (Eph. 4:32). However, if someone hurts us, we should ask God to help us forgive and mend the relationship because this is what Christ has done for us. “Where sin increased, grace increased all the more” (Rom. 5:20, NIV). “Conflict is inevitable; resolution is not. . . . [It] is not automatic. It doesn’t happen over time or by accident. . . . [It] occurs on purpose.”3

REACT
What sort of wrongs are the most difficult for you to forgive? How can you handle these?
1. Karen Holford, “Disagreeing Without Falling Apart,” The Journal: A Shepherdess International Resource for Ministry Spouses, p. 16.
2. Tommy Nelson, The Book of Romance: What Solomon Says About Love, Sex, and Intimacy (Nashville, Tenn.: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1998), p. 140.
3. Ibid., pp. 132, 133.

Friday – Futher Study

Colossians 3:12–17

Character of the New Man

12 Therefore, vas the elect of God, holy and beloved, wput on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 xbearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. 14 yBut above all these things zput on love, which is the abond of perfection. 15 And let bthe peace of God rule in your hearts, cto which also you were called din one body; and ebe thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another fin psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. 17 And gwhatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.

Matthew 18:15–18

The Offended Brother

15 “Moreover oif your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, pyou have gained your brother. 16 But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that q‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’ 17 And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a rheathen and a tax collector.

18 “Assuredly, I say to you, swhatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.

 

 

Ellen G. White, Selected Messages, Book 1, pp. 174-176.

Subjects Difficult to Understand

In this work there is danger of bringing before the people theories which, while they may be all truth, will create controversy, and will not lead men to the great supper prepared for them. We want the love of God formed within to subdue and soften our human nature and to bring us into conformity to His holy character. Then we shall spread before the people the unsearchable riches of Christ in all their abundance. The invitation is given by Christ Himself, and it is the work of all His followers to call attention to the board of provisions that has been made accessible to all. Then let not subjects difficult to be understood come first. Christ is calling men to the banquet, and let all who will, come.

The One Hundred and Forty-four Thousand

Christ says that there will be those in the church who will present fables and suppositions, when God has given grand, elevating, ennobling truths which should ever be kept in the treasure house of the mind. When men pick up this theory and that theory, when they are curious to know something it is not necessary for them to know, God is not leading them. It is not His plan that His people shall present something which they have to suppose, which is not taught in the Word. It is not His will that they shall get into controversy over questions which will not help them spiritually, such as, Who is to compose the hundred and forty-four thousand? This those who are the elect of God will in a short time know without question.
My brethren and sisters, appreciate and study the truths God has given for you and your children. Spend not your time in seeking to know that which will be no spiritual help. “What shall I do to inherit eternal life?” (Luke 10:25). This is the all-important question, and it has been clearly answered. “What is written in the law? how readest thou?”

Christ Calls for Unity

Our church members see that there are differences of opinion among the leading men, and they themselves enter into controversy regarding the subjects under dispute. Christ calls for unity. But He does not call for us to unify on wrong practices. The God of heaven draws a sharp contrast between pure, elevating, ennobling truth and false, misleading doctrines. He calls sin and impenitence by the right name. He does not gloss over wrongdoing with a coat of untempered mortar. I urge our brethren to unify upon a true, scriptural basis.

No Strife for Supremacy

When the laborers have an abiding Christ in their own souls, when all selfishness is dead, when there is no rivalry, no strife for the supremacy, when oneness exists, when they sanctify themselves, so that love for one another is seen and felt, then the showers of the grace of the Holy Spirit will just as surely come upon them as that God’s promise will never fail in one jot or tittle. But when the work of others is discounted, that the workers may show their own superiority, they prove that their own work does not bear the signature it should. God cannot bless them.

Ellen G. White, Last Day Events, pp. 189-190.

A revival of true godliness among us is the greatest and most urgent of all our needs. To seek this should be our first work. There must be earnest effort to obtain the blessing of the Lord, not because God is not willing to bestow His blessing upon us, but because we are unprepared to receive it. Our heavenly Father is more willing to give His Holy Spirit to them that ask Him, than are earthly parents to give good gifts to their children. But it is our work, by confession, humiliation, repentance, and earnest prayer, to fulfill the conditions upon which God has promised to grant us His blessing. A revival need be expected only in answer to prayer.
I tell you that there must be a thorough revival among us. There must be a converted ministry. There must be confessions, repentance, and conversions. Many who are preaching the Word need the transforming grace of Christ in their hearts. They should let nothing stand in the way of their making thorough work before it shall be forever too late.

Reformation Must Accompany Revival

A revival and a reformation must take place, under the ministration of the Holy Spirit. Revival and reformation are two different things. Revival signifies a renewal of spiritual life, a quickening of the powers of mind and heart, a resurrection from spiritual death. Reformation signifies a reorganization, a change in ideas and theories, habits and practices. Reformation will not bring forth the good fruit of righteousness unless it is connected with the revival of the Spirit. Revival and reformation are to do their appointed work, and in doing this work they must blend.

We Must Put Away All Strife and Dissension

When the laborers have an abiding Christ in their own souls, when all selfishness is dead, when there is no rivalry, no strife for the supremacy, when oneness exists, when they sanctify themselves, so that love for one another is seen and felt, then the showers of the grace of the Holy Spirit will just as surely come upon them as that God’s promise will never fail in one jot or tittle. But when the work of others is discounted, that the workers may show their own superiority, they prove that their own work does not bear the signature it should. God cannot bless them.

If we stand in the great day of the Lord with Christ as our refuge, our high tower, we must put away all envy, all strife for the supremacy. We must utterly destroy the roots of these unholy things, that they may not again spring up into life. We must place ourselves wholly on the side of the Lord.
Let Christians put away all dissension and give themselves to God for the saving of the lost. Let them ask in faith for the promised blessing, and it will come.

Love One Another

Christianity is the revealing of the tenderest affection for one another.... Christ is to receive supreme love from the beings He has created. And He requires also that man shall cherish a sacred regard for his fellow beings. Every soul saved will be saved through love, which begins with God. True conversion is a change from selfishness to sanctified affection for God and for one another.
The attributes which God prizes most are charity and purity. These attributes should be cherished by every Christian.
The strongest argument in favor of the gospel is a loving and lovable Christian.

Discussion Questions:

• Read Colossians 3:12-17 in class. Discuss the Christian qualities the apostle Paul encourages the church at Colossae to seek. Why are these qualities the basis for all conflict resolution? How do they guide us in carrying out the principles that Jesus gives us in Matthew 18:15-18?
• Look again at Colossians 3:12-17, and the teachings found in these verses. Why are these things so utterly essential for the revival and reformation that we so desperately need in the church?
• If we look at our church, that is, the Seventh-day Adventist Church as a whole, what is the greatest thing holding us back from the kind of revival and reformation that will be needed in order to reach the world? Is it our teachings and doctrines? Of course not. These are the very things that God has given us to proclaim to the world . The problem lies solely in us, in our interpersonal relationships, our petty jealousies, our bickering, our selfishness, our desire for supremacy and a whole host of other things. Why must you, yes, you , not the person next to you in the pew, not the pastor-but you , yourself-plead for the power of the Holy Spirit to bring the changes that have to occur in you before we will see revival and reformation in the whole church?

 From www.cqbiblestudy.org

Exploration What Tangled Webs We Weave

Luke 6:31

friday SEPTEMBER 20

CONCLUDE
All of us are in wounded relationships caused in part by abandonment, inequalities, jealousy, and pride. The relationship that matters above any other is the one we have with God. He comes to us, speaking gently, respectfully. As we receive His friendship, His Spirit fills us so we can extend forgiveness to others. Christ in us facilitates healing in our damaged relationships.